Tongue - In Cheek Ideas to Stop Global Warming

1. Promote marine aquaculture of oysters (and other shellfish).

This removes CO2 from the water by accumulation in the shells. Analysis: Shellfish aquaculture is growing rapidly (clams, oysters, mussels, etc.). It may well be worth the time to determine whether this is a meaningful impact or not. Further, since all these molluscs are seemingly making shells with no noticeable change in weight, it calls into question alarmist fears over ocean acidification meaning the end of shell fish in the oceans.

2. Reduce Hellfire.

With carbon dioxide levels shooting up to unprecedented levels, it is high time we group together for a concerted action against the huge
amounts of climate-change-inducing emissions from fires in Hell.

But known GHG polluter, local manager and evildoer Mr. Lucipher can be stopped...

All we have to do is abolish taxes, defeat prostitution or whatever else will make the place of eternal damnation turn into a glacial
wasteland.

Contributor: Maurizio Morabito

 

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This page updated or reviewed in January 2012